THE LIZZIE BENNET DIARIES

Apparently today's posts are all about obsessions.

You guys know that Pride and Prejudice (the Keira Knightly version) is one of my favorite movies, right?  Don't pretend you don't love a good "tea and crumpet" movie too!  Well, there's a YouTube channel called the Lizzie Bennet Diaries I've recently discovered, and I love it.  The premise is that a grad student has to do a MassComm project and chooses to do a video blog with a modern-day twist on the Pride & Prejudice theme.  It's so smart and fabulous!!  It's super funny and done really well.

There's a lot of episodes but totally worth it.  Definitely start from Episode 1, or you'll be totally lost.  I actually haven't finished them all yet, but here are some of my favorites so far:

Episode 15--Mr. Darcy sees his crush, Lizzie Bennet, approaching and "fake texts" so he doesn't have to talk to her.  Basically, Mr. Darcy is a male me.  That is TOTALLY my M.O. when it comes being interested in someone.  It goes something like this, "Wow, I think I might like him.  I must NEVER talk to him again!!!"  So you'll be surprised to know I'm still single.  I know!  Weird, huh?!  Yeah, I never said it made sense but then again, reality never does.

Episode 12--Lizzie's trying to figure out if Bing's sister, Caroline, is genuinely being nice to her sister, Jane, or just being snarky.  She tells herself, "Okay, I'm going to be positive. *doubtful look on face* Pooooosssssiiitive."  

That, basically, has been my mantra for most of my adult life.  The fact that it's still my mantra tells you how well it's been working :)

*Disclaimer: when sister Lydia Bennet makes an appearance sometimes there's some brief language.  It's few and far between, but if you're concerned about your conscience, don't tune in.

FAMILIAR FOREIGN

Hi, readers!  You guys know I love to cook and have always been addicted to cooking shows.  Weeeellllll, now I'm starring in one of my own!  I've started a YouTube channel where I'm the star.  It's specifically geared towards expats in Central America trying to cook favorites but with local ingredients.  I really want everyone to check out my first video, and let me know your response.  This is the first time I've ever done anything like this and am super excited about it, so reeeallly need to know how I can improve or even recipe suggestions.  If you have a recipe from home you haven't figured out how to make here, let me know!  It's called Familiar Foreign....won't you follow me?  Check it out!

THE OLLIE UPDATE

If you're a regular follower of this blog and a personal friend of mine, you've probably already caught on to how important my faithful companion, Ollie, is to me.  I know she's practically got her own fan club out there, so I wanted to give a brief update.

Ollie is getting up there.  I've had her since 2004, and she was an adult when I found her, so you do the math.  You can see from her recent picture above that practically her whole face is grey now :(  Well, a couple weeks ago, we were coming in from doing her business outside, and she was having trouble getting up the stairs.  I picked her up to help her, and she started to yelp.  This continued all weekend.  (Side note:  why is it that any time an emergency occurs, it's always on the weekend when nothing's open??)  So Monday morning, I took her to the vet and got the prognosis....arthritis.  I couldn't help myself and just burst into tears.  My vet was like, "Shawn, what's the deal?  It's like with people.  It just means she's getting old.  She could live for years with this."  Rationally, I know this.  But it was just a wake-up call that my little baby's days are numbered.  Frankly, I'm tearing up just writing this blog.

So now she's on a vitamin regimen of glucosamine, and I have to limit her walking and jumping on the bed.  All I can say is that my baby has had a good life, and I'll never once not for one minute feel guilty about providing that for her.  I think I've needed her as much as she's needed me all these years, and I feel very thankful for the experience.

RUNNIN' GAMES

Saturday, January 26th, Shelina and I had to make our quarterly trip to the Costa Rican border to renew our visas. A lot of need greaters already serving here and in Costa Rica have to do a similar process every three months.  So I wanted to describe our experience so you all know what's waiting for you the next time you cross.  It was a COMPLETE nightmare!

Just about everything in Nicaragua is a game to see how much extra money they can extort out of you and unfortunately, we gringos are often prime targets for these games.  Now, I lived in Memphis eight years so I thought I could spot a player and a game, but all I can say is that Memphians need to come to Nicaragua to get schooled.  Let me explain what happened.

Soon as our feet hit ground in Penas Blancas (the border) we had guys following us around.  Their official title is "tourist guide" but their actual job has nothing to do with that title.  They want to give you immigration forms or carry your bags for you or show you where the offices are.  This wasn't my first rodeo so I firmly said no to them and kept steppin'.  Why?  Because at the beginning of it all, they tell you they're volunteers there to help, but when everything's said and done, they've got their hand out for money.  On top of it, everything they try to charge you for is free and easy.  For instance, those immigration forms? Free at the immigration window.  Not sure where the offices are?  There's only one road in and out and it leads straight to the offices. Games!

So I get through the Nicaraguan side and make my way over to Costa Rica feeling confident.  Not to last, though.  In Costa Rica, they tell us they want proof we won't be going over our 90 day visa time limit there.  We explain we want in and out in one day and don't even have bags so obviously, we're leaving.  Costa Rica says nope!  They want to see either bus ticket or plane ticket out.  We say we're going to take the city bus Penas Blancas-Rivas-Granada.  Not good enough.  So what do we have to do?  Shell out $25 apiece for a TicaBus ticket from San Jose, Costa Rica to Managua, Nicaragua.  Games!

So we enter Costa Rica and turn around to come back into Nicaragua.  Enter group of guys again following you around offering to "help" for a charge for stuff that's already free.  Here's where the real fun begins.  The first official we meet (a police officer by the way which is the really scary part) sees my passport and sees I didn't spend the "required" 72 hours in Costa Rica.  Now, this is normal.  They always complain about this.  They usually make us spend 3 hours there and then let us come back.  But oh no!  Not this time!  I'm explaining that we're JWs and volunteers and eager to get back to our assignments.  He says no many times and then says, "Go with this guy (dude charging for free stuff).  He's gonna get an official to pass you through, but you'll need to pay a "tip.""  This is when I knew I was in trouble and was about to see the Nicaraguan corruption I've always heard about at work firsthand.

So we go with the guy and he's explaining he'll arrange it all for us, we won't have to stand in line again, etc etc.  The problem is, after he talks with the immigration official he says we'll have to pay the standard $12 visa fee + a $20 tip apiece.  We say no way!  We've already had to pay an additional $25 for a bus ticket we don't need, and negotiate this tip down to $6 a person.  So he explains we'll get in line, put the money in our passports, official will write a receipt for only $12 a person (duh!), and we'll get our stamp.  I, of course, am praying this entire time because I NEED to get back into Nicaragua but feel VERY uncomfortable being in a situation for the first time in my life where I'm told to pay a bribe.  Well, Jehovah answered my prayer in a very crazy way.  As we get up to the immigration window, guy comes back over and says to take the bribe out because the manager just walked in.  We did so and got our stamp to re-enter Nicaragua.  As we walk away, guy is asking for his money etc etc and we're explaining that no, what he calls a "tip" we call a bribe and refuse to pay it, we already have our stamp, we're outta here.  He's like, "No, you have to pay.  The only reason you couldn't in the office is because manager was there."  Shelina tells him, "No, the only reason we couldn't is because IT'S ILLEGAL!!!"  His response?  "Fine!  I'll pay the official out of my pocket.  God sees everything!"  Little does he know....Games!

No, my conscious does NOT bother me that we never paid the guy.  I actually feel so good I've yet to have to pay a "tip" or "tax" or "help" to an official yet.  I'm positive they're making my portion and more from all the other gringos here.  Case in point?  The two guys in front of us were pay $45 for their visas when the visas themselves are only $24 together.  You see?  Games!